Tuesday, 19 February 2008

Of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings

The time has come to put away childish fancies, to lay to rest my dreams because UNIVERSITY goes back next week!

First of all, Hello Anonymous Ugandan fan from Iowa. Your wish has been granted oh non-rhyming fan. I am posting more often. Where are you?

As some of the more intelligent amongst you may have noticed the post below the post below is a tad incoherent and borders on psychotically depraved but fear not I'm okay now, my moment of irate insanity has passed, to be replaced by updated, bigger and better moments of psychotic behaviour once University officially commences.

27th, strange fluffy haired man of the even stranger boots, how's the clawing going? Do you feel as though you have successfully reclaimed your domain?
An unsuccessful assassin in a previous life, huh? What was your weapon of choice in your old assassin days? Personally I always favoured the sniper rifle.
As for those emails, perhaps you should send them a picture of your manhood so they can gaze in awe and envy and promptly take you off their mailing list.
I was having a closer look at the picture of "my" goat and I realised it's pupils slanted horizontally. Is that normal? It makes it look scary!
YES! You do have better tricks then snot! There are some extremely good looking Ugandans (I'm not saying anything for their personalities, but they do look good). Just line up some hot adults and then some snot babies on a tv ad with a cheesy american voice saying "If you sponsor a snotty nosed infant today you could be caring for tomorrows studs" Or some other equally corny/smutty/sleazy line. Hmm, but that still uses the snot. Maybe you don't have any better tricks, maybe you're just doomed 27th.

If it makes you feel any better I was lying when I wrote that I was guilt tripped into sponsoring because of a snot covered child. I actually only did it because I was watching a documentary on a couple of Australian journalists who were reporting in Rwanda during the genocide and how they were affected by it. It was extremely graphic to say the least and I was very curious about Rwanda after that. Started reading, turns out I like Uganda more than Rwanda. I had extra money so I sponsored a Ugandan. No snot involved. Plenty of Blood though. Also there was this Acholi boy who was, ahhhhhhh, he's SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hot I almost died!


  1. Bambi...

    When I hit the jack pot( Read: make some money)I wanna take on about 5 kids. Not adopt adopt them....but just so that they can have someone take care of the very basic needs. Needs will vary depending on the money I have.

    There is acertain moral high that comes with that. I want to have it...


  2. Me? I used to lay my victims and break a poison capsule in their mouths while we kissed. That's how I did my job as assassin in a previous life. :o)

    Actually, not too sure. But when the impulse hits through the ether, I find myself reaching about my belt. I guess it was a knife or something ...

    Plus, I'm still gone bananas. :o( For a while yet. By the way, you mentioned cockroaches and geckos ... spot-on.Does yours do it, too? The geckos, especially, get me freaked out. They can have a tortured look when they are dead, and yet big boys aren't supposed to cry...